"Is anything too hard for me?"

A question that the Lord has been asking for quite some time now.

Kortnee, how much more do you need to see? When will you fully let go of everything in your life? Where is the trust in our relationship?

In the book of Jeremiah, the book God has given me for India, He asked me a serious question that shook the core of all that I thought I was; 31.22, "How long will you wander, O unfaithful daughter?"

CRAP.

God, for just a moment, can you not ask me questions that are going to unravel everything that's left of me?

I've been stuck on this verse, continuously coming back to it, and trying to figure out for the life of me how to give God an honest answer.

Now it's time for the backstory of all that has happened since September 1 to September 2. In the course of 24 hours the God of all creation stirred up my heart to change my life from this day forward. You may only get that if you go to LifeChurch, but I highly encourage you to watch the latest Marriage series. Anyway, I went to the gym on Saturday morning and God said, "Talk to the girl who just walked in." I turned around and sure enough there was a girl there, I continued running, deciding if I would speak to her or not because everything is a choice. Within 3 seconds of saying hello we had sparked a new friendship and conversation that led us to find a great overlapping in our lives. I found out that, Efe (eff-ay), is 28 and not a student at UCO which led her to ask me what I was studying and I told her, naturally, about doing a DTS with YWAM. Her mouth dropped as she gasped for the word, "NO!" My first thoughts were...that good, huh? Then she began to tell me how for the last three weeks God has continued to bring her fellowship and friends who are from YWAM Kona, YWAM Orange Country, and that she's been having dreams of YWAM and Australia and that she'd had a dream on Friday night and when she woke up Saturday morning she said to the Lord, "I am listening and I want whatever you want," and then we met in the gym!! How cool is God?!

We talked a bit longer and exchanged phone numbers. She told me about a worship event the next night and I invited her to church. Yesterday, Sunday, we got up and went to church and heard a great message. I ran into a few friends there and so did she so four of us went out afterward and grabbed tea and crepes and then we fellowshipped for hours. Testimonies of God's grace, having prayers answered, promises fulfilled, and praising an Almighty God who loves us unconditionally and gives us all that we NEED and sometimes blesses in abundance to those needs.

As per usual, all things must be documented with a photo on #instagram, and we asked a girl in the shop if she would mind. Maybe you know what's next...God asked me to talk to her. We were leaving, so I scribbled a thank you note to her and said we'd love to hangout with my name and number attached, and then we left. I found out that she's from California and she's a Christian and she's only just moved to Oklahoma. What a blessing!

At this point our day is just getting started. We make our way to NW OKC and sit down with a family that Efe knows. During this time I am able to hear the hearts of these children who are sold out for the Gospel. They're going on mission, they're getting their GEDs so they can go into YWAM, so they can go into the field and be missionaries, and they're trusting God to give them the desires of their hearts....to serve Him fully.

I was incredibly blessed by them. We shared testimonies and prayers and vision for the coming of our Lord. It was an incredibly ordained time where I found that this family leads the worship event we were going to so we all headed over to the location and then God just rocked the house.

He does that because He's God! Visions, prophetic acts, people getting words for the city, intercession, spontaneous worship, the reading of Scripture, and freedom in the Spirit. I am blessed.

I have been praying and asking God to connect me with a fellowship outside of my church for 3 weeks and He answered with a resounding, "I heard you." Thank you Isaiah 65.24, while we are still prying he answers, and He has. Right under my nose where I have grown up! Around the corner from where I lived are people willing to live and die for the Gospel, sold out for the beauty of Christ, and ready to bring the truth of Christ to this fatherless, godless, and dark city.

He's showing up.
The time is here.

All of that because I chose to speak to the girl in the gym. God solidified her next season and answered a multitude of prayers of mine. Last week, I spoke to my bible study about radical obedience, what's that look like?

For me, it's this:
Obeying without hesitation.

When I hear God, it's clear. That moment of, 'Should I?' All that is out the window, of course I should, it's not like it's Satan saying, "Talk to that girl and share Jesus with her," because that's the last thing he wants!

Live your life as worship!

Now for a brief about India:
I'm going, that's decided. I'm in the process of securing a position with Pioneers. Going through the interview processes and applications and still praying about what God wants. It's all about His will and not about mine so trying to keep the focus on that. If it doesn't work out with one organization that's because God has planned something else. I'm looking forward to more of an update on that soon.

My finances are crazy right now.
I'm living at my means which makes me feel like Paul, I know what it is to have and what it is to have not, and that's beautiful to me! I'm learning to live simply and I'm in love with it. I'm putting myself on a $20/week budget for groceries. This month I was supposed to only have $20 until next month, but then I found out for some reason I don't have a cell phone bill due until October! It's a definite blessing because now I have an extra $100 to bless others and to stay "warm and well fed." Thank you, James.

My heart is wrenching for those without and I desire to be like my God though I am unworthy. The Son of Man has no place to rest His head, do you really want to follow Him? I do.

Until next time,
Kortnee